Excellent weeks diving, thanks to all but jt in particular for the organising. Superb wrecks, great drifts, fantastic reefs, eerie night dives, 6 hammers and a close encounter with a turtle. Brilliant!!!
Only down side was the plagues of blue spotted rats and those fkn boring spikey fish......oh, theres another one........and another

(Yaz has posted a bit on the 'Yorkshire Divers' Forum under trip reports if youve missed it)

Skipton Buddy Divers and The Curse of the Red Sea Trip

Read on for the latest Buddy Diver trip and find out:

Whether the curse was lifted
Who had the hairiest T*ts on the boat
Who won the injury of the week award
How Dan and Nick got a new haircut
And why Nigel should be banned from drinking alcohol

So there we all were ? ready and eager to depart on our long awaited red sea trip.  No airlines had gone bust, the weather was fine?? then the bloody minibus broke down in Sheffield ? and the replacements only offered space for 10?. Unfortunately there were 12 of us.  So poor JT & Joan made their own way to the airport.  (Was the curse returning we wondered?..?)

Time to check in for our flights, to find that half of the group weren?t ?on the system? ? whatever that is.  JT got them sorted though and with no delays at the airport we were off!!  (Surely that was the end of the curse?.. wasn?t it??)

So we duly arrived in sunny Egypt (well it would have been if it wasn?t night-time).  The honey pot of the world for Visa fetishists?..  I think my visa?s actually faded with the number of times it was inspected?. And that was just to get from the port gates to the boat!  It was heartening to see that the Egyptian authorities are taking their security responsibilities so seriously though ? herding us all off the bus to make us walk through the metal detector at the port?.. whilst leaving all our bags on the bus ? sooo glad I left my Kalashnikov and my crack cocaine in my suitcase?..

But finally, we broke the curse and set foot on MV Typhoon ? our home for the next week.  And very nice it was too.  (That said, I live in Silsden ? so anywhere is nice?)

And so?..

Day One on the Big Brother Boat?..

We had a sort of lie in after our late arrival and everyone was keen to get off for our first dive.  Slight delay at the briefing where JT and Sue got told off by Paul the DM for being naughty and threatened he was going to split them up?.. Naughty?!  He knew nothing!

And off for a nice pleasant dive at Ras Katy.  Nice easy dive with Octupus, eels, and fishes?.. and stuff?.
 
2nd dive of the day was at Shark and Yolanda Reef.  Or the toilet wreck as it is fondly known ? obviously providing endless photo opportunities of divers having a dump.  Ah what japes!  Loads to see again with Stone fish, Jacks, Lion fish, Moray Eels and Napoleon wrasse?. And some blue spotted rays?.

Anyway, we all emerged safely after a brill dive ? to get onto the RIBs ? leaving me with a rude reminder that being left floundering on the floor is not a good look!

Our 3rd dive was a night dive on Beacon Rock, with again loads of fishy life.  Loads of hunting lion fish following us around ? quite amazing how high malc could jump out of the water when he noticed one stalking about near his groinal region!!  Hee hee?

After a few drinks, the Day 2 itinerary on the board got revised to?

13.30 ? wake up
16.00 ? briefing
16.30 ? Time & depth management course
18.00 ? Breakfast
19.30 ? Briefing
20.00 ? Navigation course

Naughtiest people of the day award:  JT & Sue
Most enthusiastic person of the day award:  Stuart

Day 2 on the Big Brother Boat??

Of course this itinerary wasn?t to be ? with a rude awakening at 6am.  Almost everyone was present ? in body if not in spirit?. Or in JT?s case, in spirits ? Bacardi mainly?..

And off for the first dive of the day on the Dunraven.  A nice swim thru before returning back to the RIBs via coral gardens. 

And then for the crossing to the next dive site.  I think everyone got some inkling when portholes were closed and the skipper tied himself to the mast?..  but we weren?t really prepared for the rough crossing we got.  Stu had a little lie down on the deck ? as advised by top sailing dude Al and Sue got stuck on the sun deck and couldn?t get down.  Left her feeling really poorly, but at least she didn?t have to share the sunrays with as many people?.

And JT acquired a TENS machine for his back pain.  There was some doubt about whether he really had tried it on his b*****ks, as he claimed, but it was a bit weird watching him walking around like Frankenstein?s monster with the power turned up (a la Spinal Tap) to ?11?.  We were a bit fearful of what would happen should there be a freak thunderstorm?.

So with us barely recovered, off we went on our 2nd dive of the day to the Chrisoula K.  Apparently, all the ships that got wrecked in Abu Nuhas had changed their name ? which apparently spells bad luck and DOOM!  (Married female club members please note!)  Anyway, another VERY choppy RIB ride out to the wreck from the calm waters of the lagoon.  But another cracking dive on a wreck with a cargo of Italian marble tiles, with some swim thru?s.  (Malc ? our resident tile expert - quite excited about having tiles and diving in the same day)

Unfortunately on the way back, Chris dislocated his finger getting into the RIB.  Fortunately he was more than ably assisted by our resident medics Dan and Debbie (and their lovely assistant Al).  We?re short of nothing in our club!  Fortunately it wasn?t the finger needed for the Skipton buddy diver salute, so things could have been worse?.

3rd dive of the day was on the Carnutis ? again via big choppy RIB ride.  Prior to this there was a little suggestion from Nick that castors on the bottom of my tank might come in handy?.. (how I laughed?.) It?s not easy being vertically challenged in such a tall world?..

The Carnutis was just the frame of the wreck remaining, so was nice and easy to swim thru.  Again, lots of fishes, huge Tuna, bat fish, emperor angelfish, stonefish, gobi?s?.. blue spotted rays?.

Dan and Nick had an impromptu hair styling session when the RIB came scooting across where they were surfacing?. Fortunately it was more of a blow dry than a shave though?.

And so for our night dive.  Again, loads to see ? notably a snake blenny and Debbie saw a Spanish Dancer.  (Isn?t it brill when you can shine your torches all over like you are 7 again and your mum isn?t there to tell you off?.?!)

Afterwards we had a PUB quiz (PUB = People Using Boat) with a ?prize? to the losing team.  Unfortunately this turned out to be our team (Malc, Karen, Louise & Stuart), otherwise known as the ?Cupid Stunts?.  Even more unfortunately everyone else got to choose what the ?prize? would be.  This was to do a moonie on the bow of the Giannis D the next morning ? for which malc volunteered (a bit too eagerly if you ask me?).
Injury of the day Award:  Chris with a dislocated finger?..
                   with a close runner up of Nick (with a jellyfish sting and bumped elbows from diving wrecks like he's doing the Amarillo!)


And on to Day 3 on the big brother boat?..

1st Dive ? The Giannis D.  Malc duly obliged with his moonie, photographed by Stuart ? then did another for Louise?.. Now she knows what a lucky girl I am!  (Sorry Louise ? I?m sure the flashbacks will fade in time?..)

A brill wreck to dive with loads of corridors and rooms to swim thru, all at a 45degree angle.  Lots of surge though, which made entering and leaving a bit more interesting?.

Then onto another ?fast and hard? crossing.  We were a bit more prepared this time, but still had a few walking wounded afterwards?. Well, more like staggering wounded actually.

The 2nd dive was the wreck of the Ulysses off Gobal Island.  Soon to be known as ?unseen wreck? as the majority of the group missed it entirely due to being dropped downstream in a raging current.  The ensuing drift dive was exhilarating to say the least and I can report that I saw several species of blurred fishes as I shot past them at a rate of knots. 

The briefing for the 3rd dive included photos of things we may see on the dive ? mainly various shots of us sleeping ? drooling down our chest ? catching flies ? I think mine was photo-shopped ? I?m sure I look cuter than that when I?m asleep?.

So onto the ?Barge?, a small wreck in 10-14m.  The best description of this dive came from Sally ? ?current like a train?.  There was loads to see ? scorpion fish/ huge moray/crocodile fish, it was just so bloody knackering trying to stay in one place to look at them!  Then along came our Mediterranean friends ? taking the name ?barge? literally and swimming into everyone. 

Me and Malc drifted off on the current whilst having a bit of an underwater domestic and missed the boat ? but we were duly rescued by the crew in a RIB ? to great applause back at the boat?.

Night dive was another dive on the barge, but lots of us gave it a miss due to the struggle with the current earlier ? then were gutted to find there was little current and loads to see.  That is until the Italians turned up again and turned it into Las Vegas, shining torches everywhere?.. 

After dinner was the music quiz.  For once the Cupid Stunts weren?t so cupid, or stuntish and didn?t finish last.  JT demanded numerous recounts before finally admitting that his team had lost.  Nick chose the forfeit ? JT to wear a bikini (Nick ? getting bit worried about you mate ? that?s not normal to want to see that!)

Fluffiest bum of the day award:  Malc
Most traumatised person of the day award:  Louise
Worst loser of the day award:  JT

Day 4 on the Big Brother Boat

1st dive of the day ? Unseen Wreck again.  This time it was seen?. (Hmmm?) as there wasn?t so much current.

And we were then treated to the rare and beautiful sight of JT in one of Louise?s bikini?s.  Apparently he had to put it over his own spangly thong for what appeared to be ?safety? reasons??  but considering the alternative, the consensus was that this was a good thing?..  and so onto the photoshoot.  Believe me JT, you?re a natural!!

Then after a dive on the wreck of the Kingstone, the one so many of us were looking forward to ? the Thistlegorm.  Loads of big currents, but easily avoided around the wreck.  The viz was a bit murky, but just seemed to add to the atmosphere of this amazing dive site.  The night dive was also on the Thistlegorm, but with only a slight current this time, things were much easier.  As always, loads to see, blue spotted rays (Nigel?s favourite), scorpion fish, shrimps, lion fish?.

After dinner we were all honoured to be given the benefit of Nigel?s wisdom, which made us realise that ? ?by day a mild mannered finance broker?? by night a total raving despot!?  We were treated to his words of wisdom on:

Photographers ? who don?t go fast enough and hold everyone up and stop you seeing things.  ?click n? goa? appears to be the key advice.
Lion fish ? of which photographers spend an inordinate amount of time photographing
Blue spotted rays ? Vermin/ rats of the red sea ? also see ?Lion fish?
Thistlegorm ? all the fish and coral is getting in the way of seeing it properly.  All the coral and rusty bits should be polished off and people can then see it?s a British wreck.  The anti-aircraft guns could be polished up and restored.  Nigel volunteered to sit behind them and aim at the tanks of various divers?..
The French ? they would be swimming away?. BOOM!!
The Americans ? they would arrive too late anyway?.. BOOM!!
The Italians ? they wouldn?t know who?s side they were on?. BOOM!!
Phographers ? in general ? BOOM!!
Photographers with twin tanks ??. BOOM BOOM!!
 
Well having put the world to rights and once again done our bit for international relations everyone retired to bed?. In true Skipton diver tradition, some shortly before getting up again the next day!
Mad loony opinionator of the day award:  Nigel
Hairiest t*ts award:  JT


And so to Day 5 on the Big Brother Boat

An early start at 5.30 for our dive on thistlegorm before it turned into diver soup.  A fantastic dive through the holds to see all the cargo, trucks and bikes, etc, with only one other boat diving the wreck.  Why is there never enough time on this dive???

Louise turned supergrass and dobbed Nigel in for taking photos on the dive?.. Nigel clearly having no shame (or no recollection?) and proudly showing his blue spotted ray photos off!

Then back to shark and Yolanda reef ? Always something to see ? Octopus/ turtle.  Just a note of recognition here to Joan to say that her ?pretend you?re swimming away and not looking? trick worked on the turtle and it came out of it?s little cave.  So scoff no more you unbelievers!  Auntie Joan knows all!!

Good sightings of dolphins on the way to Tiran after the dive. 

3rd dive of the day on Gordon Reef, with a nice drift dive.  Saw zebra moray eel and a huge Malabar Grouper and loads of other stuff. 

Then for the legendary night dive on what has become known as ?Gnat?s Bollock Reef?, due to it?s sheer scale.  This was due to the DM confusing the bow (i.e. pointy end) of the boat with the stern (i.e. flat end) (NB ? Thanks to Al for technical boat info there.).  So we were duly pointed in the direction of the pointy end, when we should have been going past the flat end.  Result:  A ?reef? of approximately 2m in diameter.  Yes, that?s right, the technical term is a ?rock?.  Having circumnavigated this 3 times, we decided we had seen all it had to offer?.. Several others had wandered off in search of this mysterious ?reef? to no avail.  Nick and sally did discover a spotted snake eel though so all was not lost.  And Malcolm found loads of baby shrimps and a textile cone shell?. And started wafting the sand away?.. Not realising this is in the words of Bill Bryson ? A shellfish that will actually go for you!?  Anyway it was obviously a bit on the sleepy side and malc lived to tell the tale?..  Not sure about the shellfish?.

Quote of the day award:  Louise ? I can?t find my book.?  Joan:  ?What?s it called??  Louise: ?Remember me?.?
Top tip of the day award:  Joan
Arse of the day award:  Paul the DM for the night dive directions


And so to Day 6 on the Big Brother Boat

An early start to try to sight the Hammerheads on Jackson Reef.  3 Groups went out, but only the last group saw them ? a group of 6 (sharks not divers).  They, the divers (!), were very happy bunnies and Stu also saw a turtle on the way back (which is just showing off if you ask me).  BIG up and down currents on the way back that posed some new diving experiences for some of us less experienced divers.

We chose to dive the calmer waters of Jackson inner reef for the 2nd dive.  Andrew and Chris saw the red anemones (so named due to their redness).  A nice easy long dive with tons of fishes and trevallis harassing the fusilleers.

Our 3rd and last dive of the holiday was on Thomas Reef.  This was a nice drift dive, with a head current half way round, turning into another drift.  Some of us managed to get most of the way around the reef with some serious fin work!  Again loads of fishes and stuff and a nice end to our dives. 

Back on the boat, Nigel was still harping on about seeing blue spotted rays on every dive?.. Note to Stuart ? I think you should come clean about tying that rubber ray onto Nige?s BCD on the 2nd day ? he?s bound to notice when it?s still there in Wastwater!

As we headed for port a bit down in the mouth at the end of the diving, a big school of dolphins put on a show for us, leaping about in the wake of the boat.  Even a little baby one!  What a send off!

And so into port for the last night.  A few of us ventured into Naama Bay for a couple of hours.  Unfortunately, we had a bit of an altercation with the taxi driver, but fortunately we had a big port security guard on our side who stuck up for us.

A long day to mooch around Sharm on the Saturday and reflect on the week, before a late flight at the airport?. But not so fast?? half the group got stopped at checkin, as the Airport?s Chief Random Officer made a late stand and said their bags were over weight ? never mind that so were everyone elses..!!  A last minute negotiation meant they were through?? but surely the curse had been lifted?.. hadn?t it?..?!

Most bikinis on a single trip award:  Debs
Most arbitrary decision of the day award:  Chief Random Officer at Sharm Airport

Many Many thanks to Jon and Joan, Stuart and Louise, Sue and Steve, Mark and Yasmin, Malc, (n me!), Nick, Andrew, Chris, Dan, Ali and Debbie, Sally and Dennis, Stuart and Nigel for making this such a fab trip, with brill company, great laughs and always someone to help out if you needed anything.

Special thanks to JT for organising all this.  It really is no mean feat and I?m sure I can speak for everyone when I pass on gratitude for a job well done in the face of adversity!

Apologies to anyone for missing out anything of note ? specially if it was fishy shaped ? I tried my best?.. (and thanks to JT for the fishy naming advice.)

Thank you for the compliment..... and apologies to anyone who's a slow reader - being concise isn't my strong point!

Groinal is definitely a word - well it is now cos i written it!

x

Karen - what can I say - fab write-up, well done!

NICK, hows about putting karen's write up on yorkshire divers under yazz's post, with a link to us, U never know

AND NEXT YEARS TRIP IS TO DEADELUS ROCKY ETC, get your name down nick has kindly offered to run it details to follow

Quote from: jtdivingdude on September 24, 2009, 10:47:13 PM

NICK, hows about putting karen's write up on yorkshire divers under yazz's post, with a link to us, U never know

its now there
http://www.yorkshire-divers.com/forums/trip-reports/97224-skiptondivers-red-sea-trip-report.html#post1285136
N

Fab write up.  Brought everything flooding back (including Malc's arse) - Thanks very much!!! hee hee.

We had a great time.  Thanks all for your company and the fun diving and thanks Jon for organising.

Lou & Stew
x